What role are you playing in my destiny?

What is your role in this story of my life: Are you Abraham, Issac, the Ram, the Thicket, the Alter, the Knife, one of the two Servants or God?  In fairness, it would depend on what role I’m playing…I’m constantly changing… (Praise God)

In this season of my life I am being intentional in everything I do and purposeful in what I say.  As God deals with me and my fears, I am being bolder in my faith and in trusting Him with what He gives me to do and say.

One of my first stories from the Bible that I understood as a child is Abraham & Issac: the Testing of My Faith.  Each time I read it, I get something new.  I have been stuck on the “THICKET” for a while.  Just this morning it came to me…the thicket in my life are the people who I have allowed to dilute my dreams and poison my hopes. I have lived in fear of everything my entire life! I have held back from doing great things because I allowed other people’s fears and doubts of their life to shape mine.  I remember the first time I stepped out on faith and did something HUGE that someone said I shouldn’t do – I DID IT!!  That was 11 years ago.

Since then, I have accomplished things that were centered around my son. When it comes to him, nothing is impossible for me to do for HIM, in the past I didn’t have that same drive for myself…Until TODAY!

On this day, I will play the role of Abraham – I will do what God asks me to do.  My passion (Issac), I will offer it up to God, trusting Him with it…stay tuned to see how the rest of my story unfolds!!

After these things God tested Abraham and said to him, “Abraham!” And he said, “Here I am.” He said, “Take your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains of which I shall tell you.” So Abraham rose early in the morning, saddled his donkey, and took two of his young men with him, and his son Isaac. And he cut the wood for the burnt offering and arose and went to the place of which God had told him. On the third day Abraham lifted up his eyes and saw the place from afar. Then Abraham said to his young men, “Stay here with the donkey; I and the boy will go over there and worship and come again to you.”  Genesis 22:1‭-‬5 ESV

Pray this prayer in agreement with me:  Heavenly Father, I am having trouble putting all things into your hands. I am having trouble trusting you. Things are unraveling right before my eyes and there isn’t anything I can do about it. How do I trust? How do I take all things and put them over to you? Do I just sit here and let things slide while I tell myself you will take care of things? I can talk to you but generally speaking you don’t talk back to me in an audible voice. You can see me but I can’t see you. Do I wait until there is nothing to be done? What do I do and how do I do it? I know I am rambling, Lord. Sometimes things pile up over me until I am gasping for air and I don’t know what to do. So, I need your help.
Like always, I need your help to trust you. Sounds pretty pathetic to tell you I need help trusting you. However, the really great thing is that I know you will help me.
Is this goofy or what? Already I am beginning to get one of those little moments from you.
Already I hear you tell me to use what I have for your glory. Already I hear you tell me to glory not in myself or be depressed about myself but to glory in You. As always, you are right. Thank you Lord. You never disappoint.  All these things I humbly pray in the name of my most Blessed Lord Jesus Christ, Amen!!

Written by: Michelle while in the cocoon!

Walking into my destiny…OnPurpose!!

Happy Birthday to my son…Mommy Loves You, Kiddo!!

Toxic People & Relationships

Read:  John 13:1-17

When you look for toxic people in the gospel, your eyes might land on Herod, Pilate, the religious leaders or Judas.  There is something horrifying about Judas – he is a disciple, Jesus chose him as one of the twelve, he is a friend, a companion over the three years of Jesus’ ministry.

Toxic people are inevitable. How do you deal with them? How did Jesus deal with Judas?

Jesus’ way of dealing with toxic people was to serve them, show them love, and welcome them in.  If we are to follow Jesus, this is how we should deal with toxic people!  Jesus says: “do this in remembrance of me” as He ate with a toxic person.

What is our purpose? Is it to change the toxic person or is it to be like Jesus?  No, It is not to change people – it is right after this that Jesus frees him to betray Him.  It is our goal to be like Jesus and let God change your Judas (toxic people.)

How do you identify or recognize  your Judas (Toxic People)?

  1. Toxic People – keep you guessing about which version of them you’re getting.
  2. Toxic People – manipulate.
  3. Toxic People – won’t own their feelings.
  4. Toxic People – make you prove yourself to them.
  5. Toxic People – never apologize.
  6. Toxic People – are there in a crisis but never ever share in your joy.
  7. Toxic People – leave a conversation unfinished – and then go offline and hide.
  8. Toxic People – use non-toxic words with a toxic tone.
  9. Toxic People – bring irrelevant detail into conversations.
  10. Toxic People – make it about the way you’re talking, rather than what you’re talking about.
  11. Toxic People – exaggerate.
  12. Toxic People – are judgmental.

It doesn’t have to be all these things…It could be just one.

What you should do?  How to I graud myself from Judas (Toxic People)?

  1. Squash Negative –Talk
  2. Set Limits (Especially with Complainers)
  3. Rise Above
  4. Stay Aware of those Emotions
  5. Establish Boundaries and STICK WITH THEM
  6. Don’t Let Anyone Limit You Joy
  7. Don’t Focus on them as a Problem—Focus on you as a Solution
  8. Use A Support System – Surround yourself with positive uplifting people who show you love and support.

Pray this prayer with me:

Father God, I blind my own role in any and all toxic relationships.  Help me see the truth about myself. Apply the healing power of Your Word to my heart and mind.  Deliver me from any stronghold that causes me to harm people with my words and actions.  Save me from self-destructive patterns.

I struggle in my relationship with ______. I need You to give me wisdom on how to love ____ well.  You are my shield and defender. Show me how, when and where to erect boundaries in our relationship.  I believe You are my healer and I trust You to guard my heart and mind.

I need Your specific directions on how to interact with ______.

I want to love _____ with a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith. (1 Timothy 1:5)

Help me to love ______ courageously.  Fill me with Your truth and compel me to fearlessly tell the truth with love. Let Your perfect love cast out all of my fears related to our relationship.

I forgive ______ for hurting me. I ask You to forgive me for _______ and _______. I acknowledge my emotions: _______, _________, and _______. And I invite You to steady my heart so my emotions do not rule my decisions.  I surrender what I think our relationship should be. Please transform it so that it honors You.

In Jesus matchless name, I pray. Amen!!

Written by: The “Butterfly”

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good…OnPurpose!

What Is A Toxic Person: 18 Signs

1. They often speak badly about other people.

If someone you know is regularly gossiping about others, this is a warning sign. Incessant gossiping is a warning sign of insecurity and a toxic personality.

Likewise, you can be sure that if they’re gossiping about someone else, they will gossip about you too. Be careful with gossipers and remember that gossip is usually untrue anyway.

2. They’re negative.

A hallmark of a toxic person is being negative. This includes being judgmental, sarcastic, frequent complaining and the list goes on. This negativity can be draining and no fun but it is also a big warning that you’re with a toxic person.

3. They lack compassion.

One of the key elements to a relationship is the ability to show empathy and compassion towards others. If they are unable to show empathy, they might be toxic to you.

4. They take up an inordinate amount of your time.

They show up and take up too much of your time, disregarding you and your life. Relationships are a give and take. If you feel like they’re sucking up your time without providing much in return, it may be time to reassess this relationship.

5. They’re constantly involved in drama.

If they seem to always have crisis and conflict going on, this may indicate they are they cause more so than other people in their life.This is particularly true if they seem to thrive on or actually enjoy drama. The same is true if they seem to always have a big personal mess going on.

6. They lie to you.

In addition to straight out lies, make note of even slight variations on what they tell you and note the omission of critical facts as well. Often times, it is difficult to spot a direct lie, but rather, things just don’t add up. If someone is lying or bending the truth it is wise to question whether you can trust them in your life.

7. They criticize you.

It’s one thing to help a friend out if they have some food caught in their teeth. It’s another if someone is constantly criticizing you or offering their “advice” about you and your life. This is very true of the parent-child relationship. If you feel like you are always being corrected, it’s probably them and not you.

8. They talk way more than they listen.

A big red flag is when someone talks way more than they listen or if they don’t really listen at all.

9. They act like a victim.

If they frequently blame all their problems on someone else or some situation – or even if they blame their own mistakes on someone else or some situation – this is a red flag. A lack of personal responsibility is a sign of toxicity. Be careful, toxic people can be quite convincing.

10. They are hurtful.

If someone purposefully says hurtful thing to you or engages in hurtful actions against you or even just disregard your feelings, consider them toxic to you. The way we are treated is important. It matters and if someone hurts you regularly, they are not good for you.

11. They’re always stressed out.

Life is stressful for all of us. No one gets by without some stress. If someone magnifies their stress or compounds it through their choices, they might be toxic.

12. They lose their temper.

Being around someone with a temper problem can be excruciating and unnerving. If it seems like they need anger management, you can rest assured they are toxic to your life and  you do not need to expose yourself to this.

13. They need to be right.

A sign of a toxic person is their need to be right. If they’re constantly trying to prove themselves or close off to the opinions of others, this is not good. Likewise, toxic people will often claim to be right even if they’re not. Conversation is not supposed to be a challenge that must be won. This is unhealthy.

14. They treat others poorly.

Have you ever noticed that someone can be kind to you and the people in your circle, but when you’re around other people, they treat them poorly. This includes other co-workers, service people (such as a waiter or waitress). This can be a tip off that the person is putting on a show when they’re with you, but you can see the real person in how they treat others.

15.  They’re self-absorbed.

If they usually consider themselves first, have a need to talk about their own stuff and are not there for you when you need them, consider this a warning sign that they are either not a true friend or they are toxic. Also pay attention to whether they are looking to see what they can gain in a given situation versus what they can give.

16. They try to control you.

If someone tries to tell you what to do or say or how to act, this is a huge red flag. This can often show up as manipulative behaviors as well. If you feel like you’re being used as a puppet, it’s time to take a deeper look into the relationship.

17. They have unresolved addiction issues.

No question that being in a relationship with someone battling addiction can be one of the most difficult and painful things you could ever deal with. People in the throws of addiction will often exemplify many of these behaviors listed here – not because it is their true nature, but rather because of their addiction. Addiction is a serious issue. If you have a relationship with someone who is an addict, it is imperative to seek help for yourself.

18. You just have a bad vibe about them.

When in doubt, if you have a bad vibe, trust it. Your intuition is a valuable tool and is usually right. Even if you can’t put your finger on it, you should avoid or limit interaction with someone when your gut says to “look out!”

Pray this prayer with me:

Dear God, I have loved well but not wisely. I’ve given my heart to someone who has not honored that gift and I realize this relationship does not serve either of us. Please give me the courage and strength to end this relationship gracefully. Help me to forgive, heal and move on with my life so that I may open the door to new happiness. In Jesus’ matchless name, Amen!

 If you are in an abusive relationship and you don’t know what to do – Get Help Here http://www.thehotline.org/ 
call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−7233 or TTY 1−800−787−3224.
The “Butterfly” has been there before.  You can get out too!
In case no one has told you, You are beautiful, God loves you and so do I…OnPurpose!!!

What role are you playing in my destiny?

What is your role in this story of my life: Are you Abraham, Issac, the Ram, the Thicket, the Alter, the Knife, one of the two Servants or God?  In fairness, it would depend on what role I’m playing…I’m constantly changing… (Praise God)

In this season of my life I am being intentional in everything I do and purposeful in what I say.  As God deals with me and my fears, I am being bolder in my faith and in trusting Him with what He gives me to do and say.

One of my first stories from the Bible that I understood as a child is Abraham & Issac: the Testing of My Faith.  Each time I read it, I get something new.  I have been stuck on the “THICKET” for a while.  Just this morning it came to me…the thicket in my life are the people that I have allowed to dilute my dreams and poison my hopes. I have lived in fear of everything my entire life! I have held back from doing great things because I allowed other people’s fears and doubts of their life to shape mine.  I remember the first time I stepped out on faith and did something HUGE that someone said I souldn’t do – I DID IT!!  That was 11 years ago.

Since then, I have accomplished things that were centered around my son. When it comes to him, nothing is impossible for me to do but until resent I didn’t have that same drive for myself…Until TODAY!

On this day, I will play the role of Abraham – I will do what God asks me to do.  My passion is Issac, I will offer it up to God, trusting Him with it…stay tuned to see how the rest of my story unfolds!!

After these things God tested Abraham and said to him, “Abraham!” And he said, “Here I am.” He said, “Take your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains of which I shall tell you.” So Abraham rose early in the morning, saddled his donkey, and took two of his young men with him, and his son Isaac. And he cut the wood for the burnt offering and arose and went to the place of which God had told him. On the third day Abraham lifted up his eyes and saw the place from afar. Then Abraham said to his young men, “Stay here with the donkey; I and the boy will go over there and worship and come again to you.”  Genesis 22:1‭-‬5 ESV

Lord, help me stay connected to you so that I do not dilute your plans for my destiny!!

I will not listen to toxic words from anyone…OnPurpose!

Written by: The Butterfly